Tag: Humour

It’s far, far too hot to do ANYTHING!!!

Turn off your computers, disconnect your wifi, and go out of your houses and frolic on the grass.

That should produce rain, and then we can all get back to work again.

I thought this story must be a spoof.  But apparently it isn’t:

A multi-faith praying machine called the Pray-O-Mat has been installed at the University of Manchester.

The specially converted photo booth offers more than 300 pre-recorded prayers and incantations in 65 different languages via a touch screen.

The free-to-use machine, designed by German artist Oliver Sturm, is part of a three-year project on multi-faith spaces by the university. …

Project leader Ralf Brand, senior architecture lecturer, said: “Though the Pray-o-mat is a bit tongue-in-cheek, there is a serious message to what we’re doing.

“Successful multi-faith spaces do not need to be flashy or expensive.

Other than to the taxpayer, no doubt, who carried these clowns for three years.

I was under the impression that there was a real problem for young scholars in obtaining teaching posts in UK universities.  A young scholar with skills in Syriac and Coptic will still find himself on the dole, unless he emigrates.  Young archaeologists and classicists fight over a handful of opportunities, and the money spent educating the rest is wasted. 

Perhaps Manchester University might consider terminating the contract of Dr Ralf Brand and his merry pranksters, and using the money instead to fund some junior research fellowships in real academic disciplines.  That is, after all, what the education budget is supposed to be used for.

UPDATE: This rubbish cost you and me 452,000 pounds UK, or around $700,000.  It costs around 5,000 GBP — about $7,000 — to translate a 10,000 word ancient text into English.  That’s about the size of a “book” in most ancient texts, and perhaps relates to the size of a papyrus roll.  So for the same money we could have funded the translation of 100 texts which are unknown and inaccessible to everyone. 

An amusing item was posted by Professor Edith Hall on the CLASSICS-L list yesterday, which came into LT-ANTIQ as well:

Meanwhile, proof has arrived of the potency of our subject. One of my PhD students, Katie Billotte, sent a copy of a scholarly book I published as a sedate OUP monograph in 1989, “Inventing the Barbarian: Greek Self-Definition through Tragedy”, to her penpal currently housed in a Colorado gaol. This is the letter she has just received from the Wardens’ Office–Crowley Correctional Facility (pictured here):

‘We are returning to you this shipment made to Inmate #90704 currently held in the Colorado Department of Corrections. We have determined that Inventing the Barbarians by Edith Hall constitutes contraband under the State of Colorado’s Revised Statute. It has been determined by the wardens of this facility that the primary or secondary purpose of the author was to compromise the good order and efficient operation of a facility under the jurisdiction of the Colorado Department of Corrections. Please note that any further attempts to introduce this item into any facility currently operated by the Colorado Department of Corrections will be referred to the Office of the Attorney General.’

Phew! No wonder people want to close Classics down!”

The stupidity of petty officialdom is one reason why the number of petty officials should be kept as low as possible.

UPDATE: I’ve found a webpage for the prison here, and forwarded the email on CLASSICS-L to their PR man with a note that it is going viral.  It will be interesting to see how they handle the matter.

I’ve just seen the website of St. Marys, Bletchley, which has the slogan:

Following Jesus ever more closely

Just like this:

Hmm.  It’s probably my warped sense of humour, but this conjured up quite an image.

Following Jesus closely…
And more closely …
And still more closely …
And … ouch!

I have this picture of Jesus, robes and all, walking down the street with a gang of anglicans jostling to follow him “ever more closely”, until one of them accidentally treads on His robe!

Which is possible not the image intended.

A worthy sentiment, but possibly in need of some rephrasing!

In certain societies, in order for a marriage to take place, the groom must purchase the bride from her father, in return for a certain number of camels.  (I vaguely remember reading this somewhere, or perhaps heard it on the radio, so it must be true)

In others, the father is obliged to pay the groom to take his daughter away, again in livestock, i.e. camels.

One can only speculate as to why this is so.  Possibly the daughters in the first tribe are more attractive than those in the second. 

But the important thing is the central role played by the camel.  It is hardly important in which direction the camel is travelling, after all.

Which leads naturally to the question of why this foul-tempered, evil-smelling, vicious quadruped has become the medium of exchange necessary for the continuance of the human race in these tribes?

Possibly it explains the preference for raiding instead, in which obtaining a wife does not require the involvement of camels.